3 Red Flags to look for when dating as a Christian Single

Hey Queen,

I just wanted to let you know that dating as a Christian single can be an exciting journey, but it also requires discernment, patience and wisdom. While no one is perfect, there are certain behaviors or attitudes that can signal deeper issues and may mean that you need to refrain from proceeding with a dating relationship. Here are three key red flags to be aware of when you are navigating the dating scene as a christian single.

1. Lack of alignment in faith in Jesus

If the person you’re dating shows little interest in growing their faith with Jesus or their values conflict with yours, this can create tension in the relationship. For example:

• They dismiss your commitment to prayer, church attendance, or biblical principles.

• They express little desire to discuss or prioritize spiritual matters.

• They encourage behaviors that go against your convictions, such as dishonesty or compromise in purity.

A shared faith in Jesus is foundational for building a Christ-centered relationship.

2. Dishonesty or Inconsistent Behavior

Trust is critical in any relationship. If someone frequently changes their stories, avoids accountability, or has a pattern of secretive behavior, these are signs to proceed with caution. Examples might include:

• Avoiding transparency about past relationships or finances.

• Making promises they rarely keep.

• Actions not matching their words.

A person who values honesty and integrity will aim to live authentically, even when it’s difficult.

3. Control or Manipulation

Healthy relationships involve mutual respect and freedom. Watch out for signs of controlling behavior, such as:

• Attempting to isolate you from friends or family.

• Using guilt or shame to influence your decisions.

• Not allowing you to have your own opinion on things or shaming you for your opinion.

A Christ-centered relationship should foster love and encouragement, not domination.

As a Christian single woman, your relationship should bring you closer to God and reflect his love. Pay attention to these red flags, seek wise counsel from trusted mentors, and rely on prayer for guidance. Don’t be in a rush. Don’t feel like you have to compromise in order to have a relationship. When you honor God with your dating life, you are telling him that your relationship with him is the most important and you will not idolize being in a relationship. Choosing to wait on God for the right one is not always easy, sometimes you may be tempted to compromise or lose hope.

The good news is that you do not have to walk this journey alone, let me hold your hand and walk with you.

Until next time, take care Queen!